The Art of the Four-Legged Deal

Six furry balls huddled in the corner. All black with 'Philattendant following closely behind in anticipation of this
Specter hair' going every which way, their fat belliessphere of unbridled energy slipping out of their hands.
extended and moving up and down in a cadence toI've had enough dog trauma in my lifetime. God forbid
be envied by the Rockettes. Except one however.we give the pup a skull fracture even before we get
Breaking rank and file, shattering the tranquility of herher home.
paper-lined, metal-barred home, herProper papers filled out, money quickly exchanged,
black-eyed-and-pink-tongued mug pressed against theinstructions given on being a responsible pet owner
cage, her spasmodic body uncontrollable inand we were finally out of the door and on our way
take-me-home, take-me-home mode. Jumping,home with our new puppy safely placed in a
pleading, break-dancing on yesterday's news. Whocardboard box lined with an old baby receiving blanket
could resist?in case of traveling trauma accidents.
And that's how our life began with ourOf course, none of the children could keep their hands
schnauzer-poodle mix, Quiche Lorraine, the star of thisoff Little Miss Personality and after having to accept
story. She was the one. This little black animated furthat not everyone could sit next to the box, she was
ball had given the song and dance of her life and weput in the center of the back seat and the losing child
bought it hook line and sinker.had to sit next to the least favored animal in the car.
The gullible audience to her Oscar worthyMe.
performance were my children and, the adult whoLeave it to a six week old puppy to have already
should have known better, their mother.mastered the art of the deal. I knew my place. She
The children could hardly contain her wiggles in theirwas the queen and I knew thereafter that I would be
arms as we carried her up to the desk, the ASPCAat the end of the affection line.